Tired Of Settling?

Photo Credit: Ian Keefe

"It is what it is."

     When I first heard the phrase "it is what it is", I was working as an officer in our prison system. After hearing this, I tried to make sense of the phrase, and I asked the gentleman, who was an inmate, what that statement actually means. He then responded in turn saying "you know, it is what it is".  This was a cordial conversation, but I pondered this phrase.

     I came to terms that the saying "it is what it is" is completely subjective to certain circumstances, but how many of us use this phrase to give ourselves permission to just settle? How acceptable is this saying especially if we have been surviving in a rut, going through with the daily grind and moving further from the life that we truly want to live.

     Self-talk and language are so important, there is an energy behind the words we use along with the thoughts we have. When we embody a concept or a philosophy, we behave in the manner of the language we use. If we are not satisfied with where we are today, but know where we would like to go, then perhaps re-framing our self-talk may be the pathway out of our rut;  our thinking controls our behavior. 

     "It is what it is" in the spirit of accepting things that are out of our control is probably the space where that phrase serves best; however, for what is in our control, how does that phrase serve us in achieving the direction in life that we want to go? The idea is to identify the language we use during our self-talk, step out of exiting and into living. 

     There may be an underlying inner-critic behind certain thoughts that prevent us from engaging in the life we want to lead. "I'm not good enough, I'm too old for this, I'm not smart enough," are just a few thoughts generated from our inner-critic that put the stops on any progress. Our inner-critic makes it easy to pull out the ole "it is what it is," and we begin to just settle. So, how do we combat the embodiment of ineffective self-talk?

      Pay attention to thoughts similar to "it is what it is", and determine if there is an inner-critic holding on to that thought. This is where the myth of fear lives, when you beam some light on your inner-critic, this will allow you to raise awareness to its ineffective energy. Raising awareness to your inner-critic will allow you to regain your personal authority, release the energy behind the critic, and propel you in the direction you want to go. 

     This is your amazing life! Value you! Stop settling, and live as the best version of yourself! 

     What are some new ways to phrase "it is what it " that would be more effective in making the progress that you want to make?

Super Awesome Stuff!
Jeff Saal CPC, ELI-MP

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